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September 5, 2012 5:30PM EST

Q&A with Bill Maher

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  • Q

    Thanks to Bill Maher for joining us today. Welcome Bill! What did you think of the first night of the DNC?

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    Bill Maher says:

    I thought it was a lot more organized than the RNC, at least the speakers didn't contradict each other, as opposed to Ann "I love love" Romney followed by Chris "Fuck Love" Christie

  • Q

    Hey Bill...do you think the people in Colorado, Wash. and Oregon will get it right and vote to legalize marijuana? Sure hope so!!

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    Bill Maher says:

    I have great faith in western states and their love of getting high - most of the progress in marijuana liberation has taken place in the west, so i fully expect them to lead the nation again. A Colorado Rocky Mountain High!

  • Q

    What do you tell your guest panel before the show in order to maintain a good relationship with them after some heated discussions?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Are you kidding, i never see the guests before the show! That would ruin everything! I like to have all the chemistry happen on the air. But after the show, we always have a little get together for the guests and their hangers-on, so that we can get to know each other personally, and sometimes bury any hatchets that might have been thrown. Even conservatives always leave feeling it was a pleasant experience, due to the extraordinary civility and kindness of our staff. Except for David Brooks, who came in an angry prick, and left the same.

  • Q

    When do you think political moderation will return to the United States on a large scale?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Its not moderation we lack, its liberalism. Healthcare was not a liberal victory, it was the old Republican plan from the 90s, very business friendly, and not even attempting to take the profit motive out of caring for the sick – to give just one example.

  • Q

    Bill, if you were advising the President, what's the one main talking point you'd tell him to focus on in order to convince undecided voters

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    Bill Maher says:

    Well, he could start with You are most definitely better off than you were four years ago! How serious is the amnesia problem in this country? Four years ago i seem to remember everyone shitting in their pants and talking about the next Great Depression. John McCain wanted to suspend the presidential campaign this time in 2008, and i don't remember that ever happening before, and certainly no one is suggesting it this time!

  • Q

    Wouldn't your job be easier if Romney gets elected? Would you ever run out of material?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Yes! Considering he would be hilarious on day one, I should have given HIM the million bucks!

  • Q

    Bill, what do you think about progressive third party candidates Jill Stein and Rocky Anderson?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Never heard of them. That doesn't mean they're not great, but i learned my lesson in 2000. The way this country is set up, you only get two choices, coke or pepsi, and it would take a change in the constitution to alter that, and that's not likely to happen since half the country think that document came directly from Jesus. That's a shitty situation, but its the one we have to live with: you can vote for Obama, or the Representative of the Mental Patient Party

  • Q

    Where do you see the country in 5 years if Obama wins? If Romney wins?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Obama: weed is legal, and abortion is free at the mall. Romney: at war with Costa Rica overseas, a dead ringer for Mumbai domestically.

  • Q

    Considering the religious idiocy that continues to plague the United States, would you consider doing a "Religulous 2" and what would you specifically cover?

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    Bill Maher says:

    I don't want to go through what it takes to make a movie again, but there is a natural sequel, and that is to cover the eastern religions like Hinduism and Buddhism, which absolutely fit the criteria of religions, in that they, too, are full of preposterous nonsense.

  • Q

    What would your plan of action be if you ran for office?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Denying every single thing I ever said on television over the last 20 years.

  • Q

    Why do you think so many people are afraid to admit they are atheists?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Its where gay was 20 years ago, but its changing rapidly. Everyone thinks they're alone in it, and then they find themselves whispering with another person who feels the same way and they both go, "Then why are we whispering?"

  • Q

    How do you feel about "pick and choose" religious people? Is it not a logical fallacy to condemn one biblical teaching and praise another?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Of course, but when did religion ever care about logic??

  • Q

    Do you think the failure of the educational system in this country has anything to do with people voting republican?

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    Bill Maher says:

    There's lots of blame to go around for all parties, political and otherwise, but the people who never get any blame who should (because they ARE the voters) are: parents! They too often don't back up the teachers and they'd rather spoil and coddle their kids to the detriment of their education.

  • Q

    Being a large contributor to the Democratic cause, have you noticed any perks t such as special meetings, treatment at the convention, etc.?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Perks? Obama won't even let his SURROGATES on my show!

  • Q

    That's all the time we have for today's Q&A. A huge thank you to Bill Maher for joining us. Anything else you'd like to say, Bill?

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    Bill Maher says:

    Great to talk to you! Thanks for watching the show and let's do it again soon.

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